लालयेत् पञ्चवर्षाणि दशवर्षाणि ताडयेत् ।
प्राप्ते तु षोडशे वर्षे पुत्रं मित्रवदाचरेत् ॥- चाणक्यनीतिः
Word meaning:
लालयेत् = pamper
पञ्चवर्षाणि = पञ्च-5, वर्षाणि- years
दशवर्षाणि = दश-10, वर्षाणि- years
ताडयेत् = beat/ punish
प्राप्ते = attaining
तु = but/ and
षोडशे = sixteen
वर्षे = years
पुत्रं = son
मित्रवदाचरेत् = मित्रवत् – like friend, आचरेत् – treat/ be
Meaning:
Up to 5 years, the son should be pampered; up to 10 years, he should be punished; but after attaining 16 years, the son should be treated as a friend.
Kannada meaning:
5 ವರ್ಷಗಳವರೆಗೆ, ಮಗನನ್ನು ಮುದ್ದಿಸಬೇಕು; 10 ವರ್ಷಗಳವರೆಗೆ, ಅವನನ್ನು ಶಿಕ್ಷಿಸಬೇಕು; ಆದರೆ 16 ವರ್ಷಗಳ ನಂತರ, ಮಗನನ್ನು ಸ್ನೇಹಿತನಂತೆ ಪರಿಗಣಿಸಬೇಕು.
Hindi Meaning:
5 साल तक बेटे को लाड़-प्यार देना चाहिए; 10 साल तक, सज़ा/मार्ना चाहिए; लेकिन 16 वर्ष की आयु के बाद पुत्र के साथ मित्र जैसा व्यवहार करना चाहिए।
Understanding:
This quote from Chanakya provides a comprehensive insight into the different stages of parenting and the evolving roles that parents play in a child's life.
1. **Pampering (Up to 5 years)**: During the formative years of a child, pampering is crucial to establish a strong emotional connection. This stage sets the foundation for a child's sense of security and trust in their parents. The care, attention, and nurturing provided during this period lay the groundwork for the child's emotional development.
2. **Punishment (Up to 10 years)**: As children grow and start to understand right from wrong, the role of parents transitions towards setting boundaries and teaching about consequences. Punishment, when used appropriately, serves as a valuable tool for instilling discipline and responsibility. It is essential for parents to strike a balance between discipline and understanding, ensuring that punishment is constructive rather than punitive.
3. **Friendship (After 16 years)**: During adolescence, children undergo significant changes as they strive for independence and self-identity. At this stage, parents can adopt a more friendly approach while continuing to provide guidance and support. Building a relationship based on mutual respect and understanding allows for open communication and fosters a supportive environment for the child's growth.
While these stages offer a framework for parenting, it is crucial to acknowledge the individuality of each child. Tailoring parenting strategies to meet the unique needs and characteristics of the child is essential for effective parenting. Cultivating open communication and mutual respect throughout all stages of development forms the cornerstone of a healthy and enduring parent-child relationship.
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